ancient art

Dumu Abzu-a’s Library – A Lamentation of Love

“Desire Incarnate”

I lament my fate, for why does my Goddess put me through these trials and tribulations?

My heart almost explodes in my chest, as the Fire of Inanna burns bright within me. My passion matches my Goddess as I long for the sweet pleasures of making love to one of her daughters. She has me enchanted, enthralled and under her spell. With a sickening feeling in the pit of my stomach I wonder about the ancient memories I have of this sweet one. She was sent by my Goddess, that much is obvious. For the rite I was taught was designed for this purpose, and was, in ancient times, only reserved for the great Sumerian kings. But I wonder about what I have learned….

Are we to be to be, or are we not?

As a servant of my Goddess I follow her advise and guidance, thus I follow my heart, for my Goddess is the Great Queen of Heaven and Earth, the exalted Inanna, the most perfect Lady. Whenever I pray to this divine one she keeps being persistent about the importance of the matter, and the urge to fulfill this desire is only heightened in its intensity. It is quite maddening, for I am able to see the folly of my ways, yet I am fully aware that it is out of my control. This is a lesson I need to learn, as Love has been one of my most powerful personal demons. One that nearly destroyed me in the past.  Now is the time! The time to confront this horror that wears a mask of pleasure, and to conquer it once and for all. Nevertheless I am unable to resist its honeysweet temptations and lures. I guess I am going to have to learn the hard way….

As a way of expressing myself I wrote this unique lamentation which was constructed by borrowing sentences from our dear ancestors, originating from various ancient tablets. I constructed these sentences in a manner that allowed me to fully express the emotive states of my afflicted being. That these words may find the heart of the one, the daughter of Inanna.

ú-um-ta-aš-ši a-wa-ti-ia
pa-ni-ti-ia aḫ-sú-us-ma
te-mi ú-ul sa-ab-ta-ak ki-ma šu-ti
ak-la-ak du-wa-ku e-we-ku
ša-ni-iš ú-za-mi-ka a-ta-šu-uš
pa-ni-ka-mu-ur i-la-at-i
li-bi i-te-eg-ra-am du-šu-up-ta-ka
a-ka-ši-im ma-di-iš le-qa-ku
a-da-bu-ub-ka-ma ka-ma-a-a-an
a-sa-aḫ-ḫu-ur in-bi-ka
ú-ul uš-ta-me-eq a-na ma-ma-an
at-ta-a-ma mu-di-ti-i-ma
i-na ṣe-ri-ia ṣú-ru-up la-la-ka
al-kam lu-un-ne-ed-ra-am ki-ma li-ib-bi
iq-bi-a-am i ni-pu-uš ši-ip-ra-am ša mu-ur-ta-mi ka-al mu-ši-im
e ni-iṣ-la-al lu-uḫ-ta-al-ṣa ṣú-ḫi-iš i-na ma-a-a-li-im
ki-la-al-la-ni i-ta-ab-la-ale-li in-bi ù da-di
ba-la-ṭam et-pe-er
ù ra-i-ma-tu lu tu-qá-ku
ú-sé-le-ka li-ib ba-ka li-ri-ša-ni
in-bu-ù-a ú-ul ša mi-ši
da-du-ú-a ú-ul ša ka-ša-di
li–bu-ub a-a il-qé li-ba-ka sá-ra-ti
e-re-du-ku wa-aš-ra-ak
na-as-qá-ku wa-aš-ra-tu ù a-ma-tu e-li-ka
ta-bi-ik-kum ra-mi ta-ap-ḫa-ra-am
ù ši-ri-ik-ta-ka ra-mi-i-ma
ku-uš-di ga-na ra-mi
lu-tu-úr ù lu-tu-ur-ma lu-uš-lu-uš
li-qé-e ki-na-tim

It translates to English like this:

I keep forgetting my words,
I think of the girl before me.
I do not keep hold of my thoughts, like a dream.
I am consumed, I am convulsed, I am distorted!
I miss you again, I am distressed!
I saw your face: you are a goddess!
Your sweetness has twisted my heart
To you I am very much attracted
I talk about you constantly,
I seek your pleasures,
I have not devoted myself to anyone,
It is you who renews me,
Burn your desire upon me!
Come to me! I want to be embraced as my heart told me.
Let us do the work of lovers, all the night let us not sleep!
Let both of us press ourselves amorously in bed!
Be mingled together with fruits of love and the passions of desire!
Be crowned with vigor!
Verily! A lover awaits for you!
I implore you: let your heart rejoice in me!
My fruits are not to ignore,
My sexual attractiveness is not easy to reach.
Let your heart be amicable, may it not accept the lies!
I will be suitable for you, I will be submissive to you,
I am chosen – submissive and a slave for you!
In its totality, my love is pouring out to you.
Verily! My love is your gift!
Come on, catch my love!
Let me repeat it twice and thrice;
Accept the truth!

To you these words I offer…

Dumu Abzu-a.

 

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8 replies »

  1. very nice The journey is hard but it is adventurous always remember that and the pain will feel like passion and the suffering will find justice and the confusion will find clarity

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  2. Amazing text dear Brother. Thanks for sharing these beautiful words.
    Even though love can be the most beautiful thing there is, it can also be a harsh and extremely destructive force. Due to the recent issues in my personal life, I can relate a little bit with you on this topic. I believe an important key to conquer this personal demon is to be able to love yourself, and try not to waste your energy on things that you will never be able to change. This, of course, is easier said than done.
    This is a quote I read at a friend’s house a few weeks ago:
    “Do not spoil what you have by desiring what you have not; remember that what you now have was once among the things you only hoped for.”
    You have achieved a lot of personal en spiritual growth the past few years, try to enjoy the benefits from that, and truly love yourself for these amazing achievements that you have made! You are an amazing individual and should be very, very proud of yourself! I wish you all the best in overcoming this issue! Stay Blessed!

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  3. Thank you for your kind words Brother Imajica.

    You are right, for love of the self is very important. Yet, having been brought down for the greater part of this life, I am still getting used to what I am. The quote is amazing, and very true! I will keep that in mind. 😉

    Thanks Brother. I hope your own issues pass soon too. Just know that Inanna is watching you.

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  4. What I find interesting, is that it’s said that others reflect you. If so is true, then the greatness you see in the woman you describe, is the greatness that’s inside you. It takes one to see one. That’s one way of looking at it.

    I also quite like the quote Imajica writes, as it underlines what has been spoken of earlier. And I will gladly sign the rest of his comment.

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  5. You truly make me blush right now, for though I am fully aware that the members of our Tradition are content with my writings it is just amazing and very uplifting to hear such kind words from a writer whose world is obviously so different from my own. I had really no idea that people from outside the Asharu Tradition would think that way about my work. It is very nice to hear and you have put a big smile on my face with this sweet comment. Though without meaning to sound arrogant I am fully aware of the passion within my writings, for it is the passion of the great Queen of Heaven and Earth, Inanna, the most exalted lady. She is my personal goddess, next to Master Enki, and this heavily manifests within my being. Sometimes too much, for the Fire of Inanna burns with an intensity that can be overwhelming and consuming. Nevertheless I see and experience it as a true blessing, for I have wanted to be an author since I was still a kid, and now, within the Tradition and works I am engaged, I am turning this dream into reality, for my first book is nearing its completion and will be in print before the end of this year. Comments such as yours greatly heighten my inspiration and efforts on continueing to pursue this path of the sacred art of writing.

    Thank you very much!

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