I lament my fate, for why does my Goddess put me through these trials and tribulations?
My heart almost explodes in my chest, as the Fire of Inanna burns bright within me. My passion matches my Goddess as I long for the sweet pleasures of making love to one of her daughters. She has me enchanted, enthralled and under her spell. With a sickening feeling in the pit of my stomach I wonder about the ancient memories I have of this sweet one. She was sent by my Goddess, that much is obvious. For the rite I was taught was designed for this purpose, and was, in ancient times, only reserved for the great Sumerian kings. But I wonder about what I have learned….
Are we to be to be, or are we not?
As a servant of my Goddess I follow her advise and guidance, thus I follow my heart, for my Goddess is the Great Queen of Heaven and Earth, the exalted Inanna, the most perfect Lady. Whenever I pray to this divine one she keeps being persistent about the importance of the matter, and the urge to fulfill this desire is only heightened in its intensity. It is quite maddening, for I am able to see the folly of my ways, yet I am fully aware that it is out of my control. This is a lesson I need to learn, as Love has been one of my most powerful personal demons. One that nearly destroyed me in the past. Now is the time! The time to confront this horror that wears a mask of pleasure, and to conquer it once and for all. Nevertheless I am unable to resist its honeysweet temptations and lures. I guess I am going to have to learn the hard way….
As a way of expressing myself I wrote this unique lamentation which was constructed by borrowing sentences from our dear ancestors, originating from various ancient tablets. I constructed these sentences in a manner that allowed me to fully express the emotive states of my afflicted being. That these words may find the heart of the one, the daughter of Inanna.
te-mi ú-ul sa-ab-ta-ak ki-ma šu-ti
ak-la-ak du-wa-ku e-we-ku
ša-ni-iš ú-za-mi-ka a-ta-šu-uš
li-bi i-te-eg-ra-am du-šu-up-ta-ka
a-ka-ši-im ma-di-iš le-qa-ku
ú-ul uš-ta-me-eq a-na ma-ma-an
i-na ṣe-ri-ia ṣú-ru-up la-la-ka
al-kam lu-un-ne-ed-ra-am ki-ma li-ib-bi
iq-bi-a-am i ni-pu-uš ši-ip-ra-am ša mu-ur-ta-mi ka-al mu-ši-im
e ni-iṣ-la-al lu-uḫ-ta-al-ṣa ṣú-ḫi-iš i-na ma-a-a-li-im
ki-la-al-la-ni i-ta-ab-la-ale-li in-bi ù da-di
ù ra-i-ma-tu lu tu-qá-ku
ú-sé-le-ka li-ib ba-ka li-ri-ša-ni
in-bu-ù-a ú-ul ša mi-ši
da-du-ú-a ú-ul ša ka-ša-di
li–bu-ub a-a il-qé li-ba-ka sá-ra-ti
na-as-qá-ku wa-aš-ra-tu ù a-ma-tu e-li-ka
ta-bi-ik-kum ra-mi ta-ap-ḫa-ra-am
ù ši-ri-ik-ta-ka ra-mi-i-ma
ku-uš-di ga-na ra-mi
lu-tu-úr ù lu-tu-ur-ma lu-uš-lu-uš
It translates to English like this:
I keep forgetting my words,
I think of the girl before me.
I do not keep hold of my thoughts, like a dream.
I am consumed, I am convulsed, I am distorted!
I miss you again, I am distressed!
I saw your face: you are a goddess!
Your sweetness has twisted my heart
To you I am very much attracted
I talk about you constantly,
I seek your pleasures,
I have not devoted myself to anyone,
It is you who renews me,
Burn your desire upon me!
Come to me! I want to be embraced as my heart told me.
Let us do the work of lovers, all the night let us not sleep!
Let both of us press ourselves amorously in bed!
Be mingled together with fruits of love and the passions of desire!
Be crowned with vigor!
Verily! A lover awaits for you!
I implore you: let your heart rejoice in me!
My fruits are not to ignore,
My sexual attractiveness is not easy to reach.
Let your heart be amicable, may it not accept the lies!
I will be suitable for you, I will be submissive to you,
I am chosen – submissive and a slave for you!
In its totality, my love is pouring out to you.
Verily! My love is your gift!
Come on, catch my love!
Let me repeat it twice and thrice;
Accept the truth!
To you these words I offer…