Do Dykes Really Have Better Pickup Lines THan Straight Men? (artwork by Godstaff -deviantart)

The competition between Wonder Woman and Superman is fierce in the global cunnilingus community network. Both dykes and straight men insist on taking credit for orgasmic cries that are so loud you’ll believe that the lease was in her name and he didn’t give her enough money to pay the rent! Let’s face it, pampering one’s face with conversations like “let’s go to the ladies room so I can tell you how good you look in that new dress after losing weight” does exist. Today’s lesbian-butch can snap her fingers like the Fonz and convince an up and coming generation that squirting is the new fellatio without losing any street credibility. In 2018 dykes are leading the polls for whose got the best pickup lines. For fifteen consecutive weeks, it has been estimated that the erotic euphemism “do you need a little lipstick for such a large camel toe?” is America’s number one catchphrase.

Do Dykes Really Have Better Pickup Lines THan Straight Men? (artwork by Godstaff -deviantart)

Although it may seem like everything in the world of oral delicacies tastes like chicken, more often than not straight men are getting called out for having greasy fingers and selfish intentions. Yes, I know women want to be loved and not traumatized. So the best thing that straight single men can do is strategize on how to overcome dyke oppression and prevent a new world order of pegging from coming into existence. Here is a critical analysis of the current state of pickup lines in 2018.

Do you need a little lipstick for such a large camel toe? (Source: dyke) Hands down this pickup line is simple and witty enough to have completely stomped out any masculine comeback by straight men, participants of the German Goo Girl alumni included. It doesn’t get any better than this! It has strong appeal to lesbians and women who are bi-curious. Add an extra star for any experimental-minded potential Emo lovers.

Can I buy you a drink? (Source: straight men) If a man is in a social setting and receives the right eye contact from a woman of interest, then a pickup line of this nature is worthy, mainly for its traditional value. However, in progressive communities, such statements are considered outdated and has been around since the 1970’s. Not necessarily a bad thing, but can be a sign that you might be a little bit too old to be in the club. Use discretion.

You be my Dairy Queen and I’ll be your Burger King, you treat me right and I’ll do it your way. (Source: dyke – see This pickup line has some potential, but according to the source cited it might inspire a visit from bitch slapping anonymous.

Look, I just wanted to let you know how beautiful you are and that seeing your face is the prayer every man should make. (Source: straight men) Yes! There is hope! Straight single men might just be able to recapture the throne after all! This pickup line, when viewed from the Judaic philosophy of looking at things from different angles, makes a lot of sense and is sure to build admiration from the recipient for its inventive qualities.

One important thing to consider when discussing topics of this sort is that the effectiveness of a pickup line may have a lot to do with staying abreast with current events and popular tends as these things seem to affect what the human psyche attracts. We are asking all our readers to take part in the following poll so that we can continue to report accurate statistics in upcoming articles.


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